The Importance of Self-Care and What People Get Wrong All The Time

As we continue to dive into the Sacral Chakra this month- I thought this week’s blog post topic was one for anyone and everyone- and it should apply at all times, not just when we are working with the Sacral Chakra. It is something that has become a popular topic on social media and it’s been used a marketing tool for every type of product, practice, and excursion- and I’m not necessarily hating on that…but it’s a sure sign that it’s needed.

It’s self-care.

I wanted to bring it up while we are talking about the Sacral Chakra because our feminine energy is prevalent in this chakra- and our feminine energy often lends itself to nurturing and caring for others.

If you’re a woman, I am certain it’s not hard to see the ways you extend (and often over-extend) yourself in the name of caring for others. It’s ok- it is absolutely just part of who we are as women- we are natural caregivers. But then comes our dominant masculine energy into the mix- and suddenly we have neglected that care for ourselves.

So let’s talk about it in this week’s post….what is it? Why does it matter? And how can we practice it both on and off our yoga mat?

What is self-care?

Every company and entity preaches that spending money on their product is a form of self-care. Hey, me too. But it can be confusing as to what it means to truly care for yourself with so many people throwing “self-care” items in your face.

I love this quote about self-care:

“With every act of self-care your authentic self gets stronger, and the critical, fearful mind gets weaker. Every act of self-care is a powerful declaration: I am on my side, I am on my side, each day I am more and more on my own side.”
— Susan Weiss Berry

That says it. Self-care is not a specific act or behavior or experience or item….but rather anything that accomplishes what Susan Weiss Berry says above. What helps you to be more on your side? Truly self-care COULD be anything.

A fitness influencer can tell you that to practice self-care is to get into the gym 4 times a week. An anti-diet dietician might say self-care is allowing yourself those Oreos in bed on the weekends. I will tell you an act of self-care is practicing yoga and meditation regularly. And we are all right. If the intention is self-care. And that’s where I think we need to be careful.

Our masculine energy is just going to keep creeping in with those societal standards and expectations and try to morph things that are otherwise nurturing into something that is painful, punishing, or traumatizing.

For example-

Why are so many people afraid to go to a yoga class? Or a gym? It is because society has taught us that we have to work out and burn calories so that we can be thin and attractive and therefore accepted by most of the public. And thinness is not a realistic expectation for many if not the majority of bodies. So because many of us can’t achieve “thinness” we have learned that exercise is punishment for not being thin. If we aren’t burning enough calories then we are just “fat and gross.” Of course, I could get into the issue of fat-shaming and the fact that we are taught “fat is bad” when it’s not- but this isn’t the point of this blog. The point is- now it’s difficult for many people to enjoy movement and allow it to be nurturing because in the back of their heads is a voice saying “You’re not pushing hard enough, it doesn’t hurt enough, you’re not burning enough calories, this isn’t making you thinner.” Our bodies NEED movement…but people give up on movement altogether- whether it’s in the gym or in the yoga studio. Because yes- modern western yoga culture is not all that different.

So how do we know what is truly self-care?

Honestly- that’s what you have to decide. You have to do the work of connecting with yourself and facing some of the beliefs you have about caring for yourself. As with most things in life, in my opinion, balance is ideal. Some self-care things will nurture you in restful, slow, and gentle ways. Others may be harder work or more intense. But the intention needs to be getting back on your own side. And by the way, this won’t only be unique to you, but it will be unique to your cycles, the ebb and flow of your life. One day a relaxing bubble bath will be what helps you to feel yourself. On other days maybe it’s going to a Zumba class, learning how to paint, growing your own vegetables, or ordering takeout. The work here is a truthful connection to self.

Satya in Ashtanga Yoga (Patanjali) is about embodying truth and honesty…both in how you approach others and also yourself. I believe yoga to be one of the best things you can be practicing in order to discover this truth.

WHY Should We Practice Self-care?

While our overall goal might be to get closer to our true selves through self-care, there are so many other benefits to engaging in these practices and doing this work. In your day-to-day experience, self-care can help:

1. prevent burnout

2. reduce stress/anxiety

3. gain focus and clarity

All pretty amazing outcomes if you ask me…and outcomes most of us probably would find very personal. If you’re not sure where to start, here is a list of self-care practices you can BEGIN with. You must remember you are not just some clone of everyone else. You have unique feelings, experiences, relationships, traumas, and personality traits. These are merely places to start. You must also do the work of studying yourself and how you feel engaging in these practices to truly know if they are for you.

Self-Care Suggestions:

1. Drink enough water

2. Get enough sleep

3. Prioritize movement- any type of movement and try different things! Maybe it’s just dancing around to your favorite song while making dinner!

4. Intuitive eating over diet culture- As someone who still struggles with disordered eating, I can say that learning about intuitive eating from a Registered Dietician has been one of the most life-changing things for me. If this resonates with you at all- seek more info from an RDN (not a nutritionist or influencer).

5. Make time to be creative (paint, sculpt, sing, play an instrument, bake, garden, decorate your room…anything!)

6. Meditation and journaling (this is also a great way to work on getting to know yourself better).

7. Of course-yoga! But only if you are cultivating a mindset of practicing. Yoga is not a workout. Sometimes it can work your muscles- but don’t mix up potential side effects with the intention of your practice.

Maybe you have other practices you love. Let me know what your favorites are.

This week’s yoga class works on physically releasing the lower back and ailments that occur there…but energetically and within our deeper practice of revealing the true self, this class is about “letting go of expectations.”

Cultivating a mindset of fluidity and flexibility will surely help to connect you with your intuition- a powerful tool when it comes to making choices, for example choosing what self-care practice is most important to you today :)

Enjoy this 35 min practice of going with the flow and uncovering your true self!

I hope you have a week filled with lots of joy, excitement, and self-care! See you on the mat-

Chels