Masculine V. Feminine Self-Love

In the wake of the body-positive and self-care movement…I feel like we’ve been completely overwhelmed with blog posts, Instagram pictures, and affirmations about what constitutes self-love. I love it! It’s truly amazing to begin to see so many people on the interwebs promoting healthy and loving practices…and when it comes to how the internet promotes self-love, it tends to be in line with the energy of the FEMININE. Which is really great…because I think for awhile now, the cultural attitude of how life SHOULD BE getting done is very masculine. I don’t mean male either. Masculine energy is not synonymous with MAN. Every single human has both masculine and feminine energy within them and each energy is responsible for different things. Masculine energy is often about HUSTLE, to-do lists, get shit done and be doing it all the time. Feminine is about flowing, creativity, and nurturing.

So in general, the trend in self-love is towards the feminine. Take bubble baths, nap, eat shitty food and watch tv for hours. And WE SO NEED THAT. However, something I noticed in myself for a very long time, is that instead of being really present in my own practice, my own career, in my own life…I used this feminine self-care as an excuse to not do anything. I just was always eating bad food and watching tv every fucking day for hours on end. Then I would reach the end of the day and feel like absolute garbage because I ate nothing but crap…I remained sedentary all day…and barely stimulated my brain. What we need is a balance of the feminine and the masculine and it is something we need to work very hard to be present in. We need to ask ourselves, what do I need today? How do I feel vs how do I want to feel? If we are truly listening to our intuition and becoming more aware of how our body, mind, and SOUL feels, I think we might start to find that sometimes…we actually can care for ourselves by embodying our MASCULINE energy a little bit more. And of course, sometimes it may be the FEMININE, but it is important overall to realize, that self-love is not always about bubble baths and eating pizza. Sometimes self love is difficult.

Here are 5 Surprising Ways to Practice Self-Love:

1. Masculine: Create a workout regimen. Movement is absolutely necessary to self-love. Move your body and make it stronger to be healthy!

   * Balance it with Feminine: Get creative! Try different workout classes every other day or week. Change it up with HIIT, yoga, or dance classes! Being active and moving is the goal…NOT LOSING WEIGHT or BEING SKINNY (fuck that!)

   
   

2. Masculine: Continue to educate yourself! Take a class online or at the local community college! Always be stimulating your brain!

   *Balance it with the Feminine: Find a mix of educational/fiction books to read so that your brain is always being utilized in different ways!

   
   

3. Masculine: Stop hanging out with people who aren’t bringing positivity and encouragement to you. Don’t feel guilty about saying NO to someone who is just going to bring you down or pressures you to do things that are counter-productive to your vision for your life and career.

   *Balance it with the Feminine: Nurture relationship with people who are also trying to be the best version of themselves and therefor will encourage you. These friendships are the ones where you can encourage each other and support one another in your own individual endeavors…sometimes that support might mean listening to one another when you are stressed. Sometimes it is letting that person know it ok to take a break. Sometimes it is letting each other know to step it up and to stop making excuses!

   
   

4. Masculine: Clean your damn house. Make your damn bed. Do laundry. Grocery shop.

   *Balance it with the feminine: It’s ok to SOMETIMES, leave the dishes until tomorrow and just go to bed early ;)

   
   

5. Masculine: Do POWER YOGA! Increase your endurance and strength. Move one breath per movement and power through. Sweat it out.

   *Balance it with the feminine: Yin yoga. Wear cozy socks and a sweatshirt. Use all the props, nurture and cool your body.

   **If you want a yoga class that will combine the two and make you feel like a total GODDESS, check this out!**

Remember that the most important thing when it comes to self-love…is actually tuning into your soul…and LISTENING. Just because a bubble bath can sometimes be a really nice way to show yourself love…doesn’t mean it is always the thing that is needed! Practice meditation and CHECKING IN with yourself. All the time. Only then can you start to truly take care of yourself and what you need. And remember…BALANCE AND HONESTY.

It’s sometimes easier to sit around and eat shit in the name of self-care. If you are being honest with yourself though, you will realize it is not always the solution for making yourself feel better.

I hope you this motivates and helps you to understand yourself a little more and how you can fully care for yourself in the best way every single day.

Happy self-loving to you!